I have been walking down this path of self-discovery and have come up with some wonderful stories of who I am, who my ancestors were and the fabulous places they lived.
I had been told that we were obviously European but also Native American and there was even a mention of Gypsy.
When Gypsy was mentioned I said….oh, that makes so much sense. Completely based on Gypsy folklore told by others. However, there were some beliefs and circumstances that made it completely believable.
I envisioned myself as a true melting pot.
So I took the AncestryDNA test.
I was so excited and couldn’t wait to get my results. Then the day came.
I am …….
Yep you are reading that right….. 100% white.
Could I still be a traveller? Well, I could be. I could also be the descendant of a royalty!
One of the biggest mysteries was solved though.
I used to have a beautiful shade of red hair. Now when I tell people I’m a red head they look at me like I never learned my colors. However, according to my DNA….
Yep, I’m a red head.
It’s darker now but in the sunlight it certainly gives a red glow.
It also has glitter lines in it and I have a shining crown.
I also learned that I don’t like cilantro because my DNA doesn’t like cilantro or brussel sprouts and asparagus makes my pee smell funny. Who knew?!
This didn’t tell me a whole lot about who I am though, just where I came from. Well, where my ancestors came from and how they migrated.
So I started looking for personality tests. I was not going to pay for one so I found 16personalities.
I took the test, read the results and felt like they had just read my DNA while looking into my soul.
Now I have insight, excuses for my behavior and some realization.
I do what I want because I’m a free spirit!
I am an ENFP-T spirit!
I mean fly by the seat of my pants is part of my personality! I almost only rely on my intuition and emotions. I am constantly looking ways that I don’t have to conform to society. I am in the 7%!
- Energetic and Enthusiastic
- Excellent Communicators
- Know how to relax by experiencing life’s joys (watch for an entire post on this)
- Popular and Friendly
- Poor Practical skills, you know….follow-through, consistency.
- Difficulty Focusing- squirrel!!! where?!
- Overthinking- really? You think?
- Gets stressed easily
- Highly emotional- Hmm……
- Independent to a fault- well….don’t tell me what to do and we’re fine!
I actually had a friend who was studying personalities a couple of years ago and she totally pegged me. She said, you’re a campaigner. Apparently I am more transparent than I thought.
Part of being self-aware is knowing one’s motivations behind their actions and responses. For most people none of this matters to them. For me the importance is, as part of my personality, I want to be liked. I want to be successful. I want to help.
Many of my counseling professors just don’t like me. They constantly tell me that I lack in self-awareness. If only they read my blog! Only one has been a tremendous help in raising my confidence.
I was told the night of my birthday party this year that there are a lot of people in this community who don’t like me or think I’m just crazy. Total motivation killer.
I live outside the box. I walk on a path and am in no big hurry. I do allow my emotions to dictate how turbulent my response it.
Here I am trying to find morning routines and planning days to be more productive and it is killing me.
I have to remember that I always get it done and done well. I don’t want to be like everyone else.
So I allowed my feelings to lead the way and I was finding out more about myself to prove to them that I am worth it.
The thing is that I didn’t really need a DNA or personality test to know who I was. They are fun and fascinating but I know who I am. I let the opinions of others decide that I needed to change my entire personality, pushing me into being unhappy. That’s unfair.
I knew my intentions. I am definitely not always diplomatic. I also can’t help others while pretending to be someone else. I want to be authentic, always.
I wish others would allow their selves to look at things from my perspective a little but until then I’m just going to campaign down my path.
I practice my princess wave whenever I can 🙂