Who am I?

I have been walking down this path of self-discovery and have come up with some wonderful stories of who I am, who my ancestors were and the fabulous places they lived.

I had been told that we were obviously European but also Native American and there was even a mention of Gypsy.

When Gypsy was mentioned I said….oh, that makes so much sense. Completely based on Gypsy folklore told by others. However, there were some beliefs and circumstances that made it completely believable.

I envisioned myself as a true melting pot.

So I took the AncestryDNA test.

I was so excited and couldn’t wait to get my results. Then the day came.

I am …….

Yep you are reading that right….. 100% white.

Could I still be a traveller? Well, I could be. I could also be the descendant of a royalty!

One of the biggest mysteries was solved though.

I used to have a beautiful shade of red hair. Now when I tell people I’m a red head they look at me like I never learned my colors. However, according to my DNA….

Yep, I’m a red head.

It’s darker now but in the sunlight it certainly gives a red glow.

It also has glitter lines in it and I have a shining crown.

I also learned that I don’t like cilantro because my DNA doesn’t like cilantro or brussel sprouts and asparagus makes my pee smell funny. Who knew?!

This didn’t tell me a whole lot about who I am though, just where I came from. Well, where my ancestors came from and how they migrated.

So I started looking for personality tests. I was not going to pay for one so I found 16personalities. 

I took the test, read the results and felt like they had just read my DNA while looking into my soul.

Now I have insight, excuses for my behavior and some realization.

I do what I want because I’m a free spirit!

I am an ENFP-T spirit!

I mean fly by the seat of my pants is part of my personality! I almost only rely on my intuition and emotions. I am constantly looking ways that I don’t have to conform to society. I am in the 7%!

The strengths

  1. Curiosity
  2. Observant
  3. Energetic and Enthusiastic
  4. Excellent Communicators
  5. Know how to relax by experiencing life’s joys (watch for an entire post on this)
  6. Popular and Friendly

The weaknesses

  1. Poor Practical skills, you know….follow-through, consistency.
  2. Difficulty Focusing- squirrel!!! where?!
  3. Overthinking- really? You think?
  4. Gets stressed easily
  5. Highly emotional- Hmm……
  6. Independent to a fault- well….don’t tell me what to do and we’re fine!

I actually had a friend who was studying personalities a couple of years ago and she totally pegged me. She said, you’re a campaigner. Apparently I am more transparent than I thought.

Part of being self-aware is knowing one’s motivations behind their actions and responses. For most people none of this matters to them. For me the importance is, as part of my personality, I want to be liked. I want to be successful. I want to help.

Many of my counseling professors just don’t like me. They constantly tell me that I lack in self-awareness. If only they read my blog! Only one has been a tremendous help in raising my confidence.

I was told the night of my birthday party this year that there are a lot of people in this community who don’t like me or think I’m just crazy. Total motivation killer.

I live outside the box. I walk on a path and am in no big hurry. I do allow my emotions to dictate how turbulent my response it.

Here I am trying to find morning routines and planning days to be more productive and it is killing me.

I have to remember that I always get it done and done well. I don’t want to be like everyone else.

So I allowed my feelings to lead the way and I was finding out more about myself to prove to them that I am worth it.

The thing is that I didn’t really need a DNA or personality test to know who I was. They are fun and fascinating but I know who I am. I let the opinions of others decide that I needed to change my entire personality, pushing me into being unhappy. That’s unfair.

I knew my intentions. I am definitely not always diplomatic. I also can’t help others while pretending to be someone else. I want to be authentic, always.

I wish others would allow their selves to look at things from my perspective a little but until then I’m just going to campaign down my path.

I practice my princess wave whenever I can 🙂

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